Richard Hammond Is Auctioning Four Cars February 21

Alright, gather 'round, folks. I've got a tale to tell you about our favorite crash test dummy turned car enthusiast, Richard Hammond. You know, the chap who's made more of a name for himself falling out of things than winning at them. Well, he's at it again, but this time, he's not the one doing the falling - he's the one doing the selling!

Hammond's Great Garage Sale

That's right, our beloved Hamster is auctioning off four of his beloved cars. Now, before you start imagining him sitting on a curb with a 'For Sale' sign and a heart full of sorrow, let me stop you right there. This isn't your average car boot sale. No, no, no. This is a grand affair, a spectacle, a... well, you get the picture.

You might be wondering, why on Earth would Hammond part with his precious motors? Well, it turns out, even the Hamster needs to make room for new toys. And let's face it, with his track record, it's not like he can't afford to replace them. Besides, he's promised to use the money to buy more cars. So really, it's an investment. In... car-ness.

Car One: The Reliant Scimitar

First up, we have the Reliant Scimitar. Now, I know what you're thinking. "That's not a car, that's a... well, I'm not quite sure what that is." And you're not alone. This three-wheeled marvel is so rare, even Hammond had to explain what it was on his own show. But fear not, dear reader, for this isn't just any Scimitar. Oh no, this one's been converted to run on ethanol. Because why not? It's not like Hammond's ever met a challenge he couldn't... well, 'tackle' is perhaps too strong a word.

But here's the kicker. Hammond claims this car is so fuel-efficient, it could drive to the moon and back on a single tank. Now, I'm no expert, but I'm pretty sure that's not how fuel efficiency works. But then again, this is the man who once claimed he could outrun a snail, so who am I to argue?

Car Two: The Lamborghini Gallardo

Next up, we have the Lamborghini Gallardo. Now, this is more like it. A sleek, powerful beast that's sure to make any petrolhead's heart race. Hammond's had this one for a while, and it's seen its fair share of adventures. Including, but not limited to, being driven through a field of sunflowers (don't ask).

But here's where things get interesting. Hammond claims this Gallardo is so fast, it can travel faster than the speed of light. Now, I'm no physicist, but I'm pretty sure that's not possible. But then again, this is the same man who once claimed he could communicate with animals. So maybe, just maybe, he's onto something.

Car Three: The Ariel Atom

Next, we have the Ariel Atom. Now, this is a car that's more fun than a barrel of monkeys. It's light, it's fast, and it's about as aerodynamic as a brick. But don't let that put you off. This little rocket is capable of some serious speed. Hammond once took it to the Top Gear test track and managed to set a time that would make even Jeremy Clarkson weep.

Richard Hammond Car Auction: 4 Iconic Motors Up For Grabs | Regit

But here's the thing. Hammond's had this Atom for years, and it's seen better days. In fact, it's seen so many better days, it's starting to look like a relic from a bygone era. But don't worry, Hammond's promised to use the money from the sale to buy a new one. Because, you know, why have one when you can have two?

Car Four: The Jensen Interceptor

Last, but by no means least, we have the Jensen Interceptor. This is a car that's as British as tea and crumpets. It's big, it's bold, and it's got more chrome than a 1950s diner. Hammond's had this one for a while, and it's seen its fair share of adventures. Including, but not limited to, being driven through a field of sheep (again, don't ask).

But here's where things get interesting. Hammond claims this Interceptor is so comfortable, it can make even the most stressful journey feel like a Sunday afternoon drive. Now, I don't know about you, but I've driven in cars that make me feel like I'm being waterboarded. So if Hammond's Interceptor can make a journey feel like a Sunday afternoon drive, I'm sold.

So, Who's Buying?

Now, I'm sure you're all dying to know who's going to be the lucky (or perhaps unlucky) owner of these magnificent machines. Well, I've got good news and bad news. The good news is, you can be. Yes, that's right, these cars are up for auction, and anyone can bid. The bad news? You'll have to fight Hammond for them. And let me tell you, that man is ferocious when it comes to his cars.

But if you're feeling brave, or perhaps just a little bit crazy, then head on over to the Bonhams auction house in Oxford on February 21st. That's where the magic will happen. And who knows? You might just find yourself the proud owner of a piece of Hammond history. Just don't blame me when he turns up on your doorstep, demanding his cars back.

And there you have it, folks. Hammond's great garage sale. It's sure to be an event to remember. After all, it's not every day you get to see a grown man cry over a Reliant Scimitar. But then again, this is Richard Hammond we're talking about. The man's a law unto himself.